is it bad that I have quite a crush on my teacher mr. kaplan? i don't kno why i do either....he's not the usual type of person I'm attracted to....I think it's because he's so dry and intelligent(he's young by the way, fresh out of college....not old and nasty). I don't kno it's just...ahh! god i hate my life....

i hate a lot of my friends too. (well, I don't HATE, i just dont like) most of them i just can't stand. reba for instance, I've knwon for 7 years and for 7 years she's been screwing me over. She's just done so much to hurt me. i fucking hate her. she's so fucking insensitive and inconciderate. it's like she doesn't even care about people's fucking feelings...Jeremy, god when i'm around him i want to kill myself just because he's so fucking annoying, and dumb too. becki NEVER shuts up, josh i don't even want to be friends with, he just doesn't get the hint. jonathan can't keep his dick in his pants, and amanda never cares about what people say, she just acts like she does. Lois only calls me when she has nothing to do and even then she doesn't even listen to me. Matt only calls me when he wants to complain about some new guy of his. He doesn't even remember the things going on in my life......

sry, I'm just venting...... my only friends that don't piss me off are laura, erin, jessica, tori, and emmanuel (suprizingly) o well, whatever....

i'm so lonely right now too...sometimes i just wish i had someone to relate to....someone to just hold me and understand everything i feel....and to kiss me and tell me none of this stupid shit matters....*sigh*

thank you all for listening to my teenage bullshit

-the Šaitlin-